A Stupid Hot Hilly Little Run in the Park

The RD says, "I guarantee suck ass conditions and a fun time." What more do you want?

No shirts - but some sort of memorable clothing to cover your lower bits. You may obtain a "medal". If you finish. Just 5 loops of a rolling 5.26 mile course. Here is a course map. Here is a course map.

The entry will be $55 for the first 50 fools, or April. After that, you gonna have to pay $65. If you wait beyond June 1, or after 100 have registered, the cost will be $75. There is also a cap of 150 participants for the race. You will get tired of the same 149 faces suffering as you go through your five loops. Statistics also say that out of every 151 runners, one dies in Cane Creek School Parking lot every August 3.

Yes. The rock moves.

SUNday race, a hot time, fluids on the course (maybe), roughly 10% shaded course, a start/finish line you will pass by 10 times (hopefully). Enough of the great promises. We will be doing bibs again. Food will follow the race. I must say that the race is held 100% on city property, so alcohol consumption is illegal. Pay no attention to the man in pictures with the bottle. He must have picked that up from the roadside.

The race will take place Sunday, August 6, 2017 at 7am [NOTE CHANGE]. Cookeville, TN. Cane Creek Park. It will already be hot by then. And humid.

New this year: If you want an early start, you must show how much experience you have for this course and how much you enjoy being on this course. That means that you will need to have finished the race twice AND have an average finish time of five or more hours. IF you do not meet the criteria, you always can work to meet it in the future.

You wanna run this race, you are a fool. Also, you need to fill out THIS WAIVER and send it in to:
- Josh Hite | 2494 Mine Lick Creek Rd. | Cookeville, TN 38501.

jhite@tntech.edu with questions. You must provide a good reason why you want to be an idiot in your email.

There will be some fluids on the course. You should bring postrace drink. Beer.


Pathetic Results 2017

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Last       First       Age Gender  City                     Time
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Studtmann  Karl          54M       Jackson, TN              3:16:37
Klyce      Sam           19M       Memphis, TN              3:18:57
Mundell    Alison        20F       Valparaiso, IN           3:22:54
Creek      Andrew        44M       Cookeville, TN           3:41:13
Clemens    Chris         50M       Tullahoma, TN            3:51:05
Delk       Kayla         30F       Greenville, TN           3:51:47
Delk       Kevin         34M       Greenville, TN           3:51:48
Wright     Brian         39M       Nashville, TN            3:55:23
Hite       Josh          39M       Cookeville, TN           3:56:35
Malecky    Mark          39M       Chattanooga, TN          3:56:50
Koeller    Kris          45M       Quincy, IL               3:57:05
DeMent     Kimi          30F       Nashville, TN            4:10:23
Laber      David         36M       Ft. Thomas, KY           4:13:44
Reynolds   Dee           45F       Lebanon, TN              4:14:11
Caudell    Stacy         64M       Hendersonville, NC       4:17:15
Lawrence   Colleen       37F       Christiana, TN           4:21:04
Bourne     Adam          40M       Somerset, KY             4:22:18
Benko      Steven        43M       Raleigh, NC              4:22:54
Massett    Kenneth       60M       LaPlace, LA              4:25:10
Bryll      Shelly        49F       Pleasant Shade, TN       4:28:21
Morris-ShruAmanda        39F       Gallatin, TN      early  4:37:55
Daley      Kathryn       46F       Sandhill, MS             4:44:38
Lawrence   Joel          57M       Christiana, TN           4:44:58
Casey      Caroline      26F       Homewood, AL             4:46:40
Lacroix    Dominique     53M       Charlotte, NC            4:47:52
Dryden     Jackie        41F       Hannibal, MO             4:49:23
Mack       Shelly        50F       Lucien, OK        early  5:01:08
Bean       Yumiko        42F       Yokohama, Japan          5:10:07
Foster     Lyndsey       35F       North Topsail Beach, NC  5:11:45
Kelley     Elizabeth     47F       Lakewood, OH             5:11:46
Samuelson  Mike          51M       Lakeland, TN             5:15:24
Malecky    Stacey        39F       Chattanooga, TN          5:19:33
Fattmann   Ken           61M       Bentonville, AR          5:23:03
Stephenson Alexander     23M       Baxter, TN               5:23:27
Montgoery  Michael       70M       Franklin, TN             5:25:47
Rayder     Robert        48M       Collierville, TN  early  5:26:27
Gladstone  Claire        50F       Ridgefield CT            5:29:38
Gibbs      Ralph         51M       Midlothian, VA           5:32:00
Luze       Greg          62M       Brentwood, TN     early  5:32:11
Wright     Tammie        50F       Cookeville,TN     early  5:38:54
Hennessy   Mary          56F       Bloomindale, IL   early  5:52:17
Ruffalo    Dominic       66M       Kenosha, WI       early  5:53:27
Smith      Dallas        77M       Cookeville, TN           5:53:33
Cacho      Maria         56F       Brentwood, TN            5:54:52
Saldana    Eddy          45M       Penitas, TX       early  5:55:46
Newman     Serena        57F       Nashville, TN            5:57:41
Mount      Brian         43M       Eastaboga, AL            6:00:28
Bolton     Diane         56F       Nashville, TN     early  6:01:49
McCarthy   Dennis        58M       St. Louis, MO            6:13:40
Staggs     Amanda        31F       Livingston, TN    early  6:19:13
Thompson   Leslie        32F       Cookeville, TN    early  6:19:13
Walston    Halbert       42M       Radcliff, KY             6:26:45
Tortorice  Angela        49F       Rockwall, TX      early  6:26:46
Shuff      Daniel        82M       San Antonio, TX          6:28:53
Schwartz   Bradley       67M       Bloomindale, IL   early  6:29:56
Bailey     Laura         51F       Chattanooga, TN   early  6:38:50
Cartwright Clifton       63M       Booneville, MS    early  6:55:46
Min        Phil          62M       Mt. Olive, AL     early  6:56:55
Johnson    Cathy         63F       Red Boiling Springearly  7:02:04
Johnson    Troy          70M       Red Boiling Springearly  7:02:05
Ma         Vincent       47M       San Jose, CA      early  7:08:54
Smith      Evelyn        57F       Rockford, IL      early  7:50:14
Macon      Laurence      72M       San Antonio, TX   early  7:50:15
Clark      Teal          49F       Jonesboro, AR     early  8:29:39
Earles     Carol         47F       Ravendensprings, Aearly  8:29:40
Baker      Bill          66M       Smyrna, TN              DNF
Orr        Sam           52M       Lebanon, TN             DNF
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